Fear

There is nothing like taking a warm bath while surfing the Internet. I guess it sounds a little dangerous (think blow dryer in the tub or something) but there is no way that the laptop would have fallen in. I mean, it would have had to come to life and flipped over and in for it to land in the water.

But I digress from a point I have not even put in writing yet.

I’m feeling sorry for myself. It’s a weird feeling because I don’t think I have ever felt it before. I don’t particularly like it, and I dug my own hole, so I should just suck it up, right?

Justin is in NYC, and he hasn’t even been gone 24 hours and miss him. Pretty pathetic, no? To top it off, I just made myself chocolate icing and ate it, and I haven’t done that in YEARS!! (mmm… so good) It’s all just a bad sign! Especially the chocolate icing part.

And to top it off, I hate being at the house all by myself. Like, it sucks. Every sound I hear I think someone is breaking into the house. I can’t wait until we get a mattress for the guest bedroom so I can force someone to spend the night when Justin is off in NYC.

I’m a paranoid individual with an innate fear of being by myself and also the fear of someone possibly talking bad about me. Isn’t that horrible – that has to be the two stupidest combinations of fear ever.

I’m not scared of spiders. Depending on the snake, I’m not that frightened of them. But put me in a room by myself or have two people stand next to me and not be able to hear what they are saying, I’m petrified. Oh, and maybe getting a mosquito bite; I have an allergic reaction to those.

It’s screwed up, is what it is.